This morning I woke up and I was supposed to be following the rainbow diet. I ate my 10 blueberries for breakfast, then went to Costco with my mother where we bought so much food... I can't even. Then again, I live in a family of five, so we need a lot of food. At least, they do. After we got home, I went to go buy a dress for Christmas and I could not have felt fatter. I tried on 8 different dresses and I looked fat and gross in each and every one of them. I hated the way I looked soooooo much I can't even begin to tell you.
When I got home, it was about five and I hadn't eaten anything besides 10 blueberries. My mom and dad went out and I was left with my two younger siblings. Neither one of them can cook and I was left to cook waffles and sausage for them both. Luckily, I'm a vegetarian, so I was excused from the fatty sausage, "Eat some, Evan!" my little brother joked. I don't want to tell you his real name, so let's just call him Tony.
"I'm not hungry," I responded.
"Eat it! Eat it! Eat it! Eat it!" I love my little brothers, but when they start chanting for me to stuff fatty waffles in my mouth, they annoy the shit out of me. I kept telling them I wasn't hungry, but they kept banging on the table. I stood up and yelled that if they didn't stop, I would send them both to bed without any food. They then proceeded to stop chanting, but weren't too happy about it.
"Please eat it Effy," whispered the youngest one. The older one, the one we're calling Tony, is eight and the younger one, let's call him Owen, is only five. He got up on his knees and gave me a sad look. He calls me Effy because when he was younger, Tony called me Evvy, but Owen couldn't say V and turned it to Effy instead, "Please don't be like before,"
What was I supposed to do? Owen was the only one of my brothers that noticed my eating habits change. He would sit with me when I looked after him and always commented on how skinny I was getting. He said the worst part was that I didn't have any energy any more. Therefore I was forced to eat a waffle for Owen's sake. You should have seen the look on his face when he saw me eat. My cravings took over and I ended up having two more :(.
My total intake today was about 800 calories.
I love my family, but a lot of the times I find myself at home, watching over my little brothers. I'm the child of my mother and father, but Tony and Owen's father married my mother eight years ago. Tony came right afterwards. I don't mind my step-father, but I don't love him like I loved my father. Sometimes I think my two little brothers are the only ones who care about me. But I don't mind that. They're pretty adorable :)
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